&just like that

my time here is spent. you've given me so much, new york. while it's still fresh, i'm thinking about how much i want to run away screaming and never look back. in a couple years, i'll look back fondly.

i'll be proud of myself for living here for so long, for leaving my tiny hamlet among the apple orchards for this big, scary metropolis. i'll tell my kids "yup, i did that!" when they ask about trudging through snowstorms to the subway to get to work on sundays, falling asleep on the train and waking up in another borough and somehow paying seemingly sky-high rent for both of us when sometimes neither of us was employed. i'll think about how it's one of the hardest cities to get by in and i found success, love and even myself somewhere inside of it.

this tiny apartment, while it had it's huge (HUGE!) disadvantages, was our cozy little home pre and post wedding. it was where we took refuge from this noisy, dirty and sometimes overwhelming city. we cooked meals in our tiny kitchen, ate them at our tiny coffee table and wove memories into the walls. it was our first real home together, built from the ground up(well, sort of?). the shelves in the kitchen hung out of the walls and i constantly feared they would one day come crashing down around ot on top of me. the stove never really closed all the way. the bathroom door locked more than one friend inside. the windows were always open. the livingroom served as a second bedroom for all of our friends and family. we screamed and fought and stormed out. we loved and lazed about in bed on sundays.

i'll miss you, morningside, but we're on to definitely bigger and hopefully better adventures.